I got 29% through this book. And I decided to spend today focused on working hard on it, because I kept thinking, we'll get past the domestic nonsenseI got 29% through this book. And I decided to spend today focused on working hard on it, because I kept thinking, we'll get past the domestic nonsense, and the cop stuff, and we'll get to the horror elements if I can just. keep. going.
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I then got really frustrated and did a Dramatic Reading of the plot summary to Coworker, who was chuckling and ended up Googling the book, ending up on 카지노싸이트 himself, to look at other reviews on here.
Upon finishing the plot summary: "DoEsN'T tHaT sOunD lIkE a GrEaT bOoK?!"
I ended up asking him to find a spoiler-filled review for me, in case it promised to get better. And holy crap it does not and I QUIT.
I QUIT.
I QUIT I QUIT I QUIT.
I am not slumping for this. It is not. worth. it. ...more
I do not see what other people see. This is boring to the point of pain.
Instead of continuing my suffering, I am DNF'ing. Instead of quietly DNF'ing,I do not see what other people see. This is boring to the point of pain.
Instead of continuing my suffering, I am DNF'ing. Instead of quietly DNF'ing, I am going to show you all the Mean Girls memes I made while trying to get through this. Enjoy.
In Strange Girls, twenty-one authors dare to tackle what makes the girls in this collection different.
Apparently, what makes them different is being rIn Strange Girls, twenty-one authors dare to tackle what makes the girls in this collection different.
Apparently, what makes them different is being raped and tortured to death.
The fact that this editor decided to include a story that is solely about a Nice Guy(tm), without any POV for the "strange girl" who he preyed upon, who did nothing to be considered a strange girl, was bad enough.
But I absolutely did not pick up a book about women in horror to read a book where a girl is raped and tortured in extreme detail. There was nothing about that story that made it special, unless you consider torture porn written by a woman special.
Do you know how dreadful it is to DNF a book in the middle of a readathon?
I wasted 10 days and 199 reading pages on this nonsense, and I am GRUMPY ABODo you know how dreadful it is to DNF a book in the middle of a readathon?
I wasted 10 days and 199 reading pages on this nonsense, and I am GRUMPY ABOUT IT.
How do you ruin a book about a girl who has a special bond with grimoires? They're magical books, often evil. One of them is made of LITERAL EYEBALLS.
How? How do you ruin this? And why is everyone in love with it?
I was told I would love the characters. Wuh-huh? Who? Elizabeth, who is so naive she might as well have been raised not cutting her hair, wearing pants, or eating seafood before being released directly into a New York Pride parade.
Nathan, who it is PAINFULLY clear is set up as the Handsome Rescuer Who Falls for Elizabeth Because She's Not Like Other Girls.
Silas, who everyone raves about and who, by all appearances, does not much more than wear gloves, have white hair, buy clothes and make a bomb ass cuppa.
WHY?! SOMEONE EXPLAIN THIS.
I am going to fling this into the library return slot, along with Enchantment of Ravens. Because no....more
All kinds of soup. I tried gazpacho for the first time last month, and I didn't know cold soup was a thing I needed and nowYou know what I love?
Soup.
All kinds of soup. I tried gazpacho for the first time last month, and I didn't know cold soup was a thing I needed and now I want it all the time.
You know what my favorite part of soup is? How the ingredients in it are so tasty and well cooked, and they sit in a thick stew, or savory broth, and every mouthful pleases the palate, even if all you get is a spoonful of the liquid without the different ingredients.
Ah, soup.
You know what this book is?
It's big chunks of boiled veggies and protein floating in tepid, thin water.
Like, there's no salt, or garlic. This is soup I cooked, rather than soup I ordered at a restaurant. And I am a TERRIBLE cook.
We have the ingredients to make a fantastic, rich, hearty stew. Monsters! Kick ass female characters who want to fight monsters to make up for her Tragic Family History. A Monster who is trying to prove his humanity. Two warring factions and a clear Romeo and Juliet set up that I wouldn't like but someone else would!
Y'all, NOTHING IS HAPPENING HERE.
You threw these ingredients into a pot of cold water, didn't add any seasonings, stirred it, and handed it out like
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And then it's up to the person handed the incredibly weak soup to add their own mental salt and pepper to make it work.
I am not here to add my own ingredients. I am an instant gratification girl, I want my soup with all the ingredients in it. I want to drink it down, so hot it burns my esophagus and I beg for more.
This is not it. And I don't plan to go for the second serving....more
In kindness to the author, I'm not going to keep going. I'm on page 67 and if I roll my eyes any harder, they might pop out of my head. If I keep goinIn kindness to the author, I'm not going to keep going. I'm on page 67 and if I roll my eyes any harder, they might pop out of my head. If I keep going, I'm going to be unpleasant in my review, and I've decided to spare the author.
I wanted to read this because I've heard the movie is beautiful and amazing.
Well, I'm glad the movie is good, because this book is dreadful. I tried I wanted to read this because I've heard the movie is beautiful and amazing.
Well, I'm glad the movie is good, because this book is dreadful. I tried to drag myself through the broken glass, but after an "apricot/apricock" joke, I nearly threw my phone out of a window.
No. Just no. If this prose were any more purple, it would be black. ...more
Really? You're going to give me a book with Alec Baldwin-as-Trump on the cover, narrated by Alec Baldwin, and then only have him narrate the first 2 oReally? You're going to give me a book with Alec Baldwin-as-Trump on the cover, narrated by Alec Baldwin, and then only have him narrate the first 2 out of 6 hours of audiobook?
It's bad enough that this material isn't funny. I envy anyone who can read this and find the humor, it may be funny in four years when this idiot is out of office, but right now, the line between real life and satire is entirely too thin for this to be amusing. But then to use Baldwin's face and a snippet of his voice for book sales?
I can't do this. I don't know what has changed in the last 10 years, I gave this book a glowing review and now I can't stand it. I genuinely can't staI can't do this. I don't know what has changed in the last 10 years, I gave this book a glowing review and now I can't stand it. I genuinely can't stand it. I am interesting in hearing someone explain to me what's fantastic about it, because whoever I was 10 years ago is not who I am now, and this is just this side of boring and awful.
---- I liked this 10 years ago. How far into it do I have to get before I like it again?
Yeah, I can't do this. I was letting Wil Wheaton's lovely voice trick me into thinking I was enjoying this, but really, I don't think I retained even Yeah, I can't do this. I was letting Wil Wheaton's lovely voice trick me into thinking I was enjoying this, but really, I don't think I retained even 1/4 of the small bit I did listen to.
I don't know that it's Ernest Cline's fault. I don't feel comfortable saying this isn't a good book. But this isn't my wheelhouse. There was so much in RPO that wasn't my wheelhouse, but it was so deeply entrenched in the things I did understand that it flowed. This just doesn't flow for me, and I can't continue with it.
Props for Firefly reference. Also the use of the word , invented by David Greenwalt, of Buffy. I'm actually giving the book two stars because of the word phlebotinum. Why? Because I can....more
I am so, so, so glad that I read The Raven Cycle before I tried this one. Because Maggie Stiefvater is suOh, man. Oh, man, this book makes me so sad.
I am so, so, so glad that I read The Raven Cycle before I tried this one. Because Maggie Stiefvater is such a fantastic writer. She has such a way with words, and she writes characters that you fall in love with within seconds, and this book is just so. so. bad.
So bad. I don't know how many hours into the audiobook I got, but I don't think there's anything that will motivate me to continue with this book, let alone this series.
Bad romance. I hate romance in books because of stuff like this. Romance that makes no sense and moves illogically fast and absent parents and life is over without the other person and just no.
Reyes comes into her vehicle, literally holds a knife to her throat. If I heard right, actually knicks Okay, you know what. Fuck. this. fucking. shit.
Reyes comes into her vehicle, literally holds a knife to her throat. If I heard right, actually knicks her with it because he's pressing so hard throughout these scenes. Threatens her parents, with the bullfuckingshit of "My reach goes far beyond those prison walls".
Our relationship just dropped to a new low.
What?
Then she's super concerned that he's going to be caught! Oh noes! And he grabs her chin to reassure her, which is...supposed to be sexy?
"I'll also need some duct tape and a pair of handcuffs." Amadore grinned. Bianca sighed, a blissful expression softening her face.
What the ever holy fuck why is she so blissful that he's kidnapped Charlie, threatened her, and now needs to handcuff and duct tape her? And why is she giving her hubba hubba eyebrows when he HANDCUFFS HER AND TAKES HER INTO THE BATHROOM ALONE ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS, JONES?
The animosity I felt at having my father threatened had waned ever so slightly in the wake of one constant reality: Reyes had threatened me before, more than once.
Oh, so it's okay if he threatens you, as long as he does it MULTIPLE TIMES, POTENTIALLY WHILE HOLDING A KNIFE TO YOUR ARTERY?
I suddenly felt like the village idiot. Of course he wouldn't have been taken back. He would have died, or horridly maimed someone first. And there I stood in that laundry room, thinking of no one but myself. Even looking at it from a different perspective, what would it have done to the kids, had they seen Reyes handcuffed and taken away?
He didn't hurt me. He'd never hurt me. He'd literally saved my life on several occasions. And I pay him back over and over with doubt and distrust.
HE HELD A FUCKING KNIFE TO YOUR THROAT, YOU STUPID CUNT.
I was keeping you quiet.
WITH A FUCKING KNIFE AT YOUR THROAT.
Fuck you, Darynda Jones. Keep glorifying abuse, just like every other stupid author who likes to take a perfectly good strong character and make her subservient to a fucking asshole. Great job. Way to ruin what could've been a decent series.
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Center of My Being
A woman's vagina is not the center of her fucking being, Darynda Jones. When Charlie's being fingered, it's not the "center of her being" that's sensitive. You twat.
Twat is also not the center of your being.
Also, you referred to an orgasm as a storm twice. Thesaurus. Look it up....more
I should've known better from the title. But even all that aside, the narrator/main character makes me want to punch something, I dislike her so much.I should've known better from the title. But even all that aside, the narrator/main character makes me want to punch something, I dislike her so much. Done done done no no no....more
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